I’m blogging to you from the airport in Huston, Texas, after our flight was delayed two hours this morning in Mexico City, eliminating our time to make a connection, and thus, our flight was changed to five hours later. We’re not complaining one bit. We are loving the free wifi, being able to make phone calls, and the overall slowness of the change.
A couple things to note, I have never been happier to hear people speak to me in English, even more thrilled to actually be able to read the signs and know what kind of food I’m supposed to be eating, and I got way to excited about being able to actually flush my toilet paper. (Old plumbing in Mexico meant that we were always tossing our toilet paper into a trash can. Gross).
I was finally able to get some MusineX and some cough drops (and actually know what I was getting). Hopefully that makes the next flight easier, and I can start feeling better by the time we go into the tribes.
Something I think is really important to note for me being here nearly 4 months, is that I really do miss my family. Before I left, I’ll be honest, I was really looking forward to leaving in order to get away from my family. I just didn’t care, and I was honestly pretty horrible. A few weeks into lecture phase, we did a lesson with the book Pure Heart, and two of the days focused on the father wound and the mother wound. Both of these had us going through the ways that our parents hurt us in some way that we may not have noticed, but still hold onto the hurt, and we were supposed to go up and get prayer to help us release from those hurts, but it just felt wrong to me. I didn’t feel like I was supposed to go up and get prayer, I felt God telling me that I didn’t have a mother wound, but that I had wounded my mother, and that I didn’t have a father wound, but I wounded my father. So I felt led to write my parents each letters telling them what they meant to me, that I was sorry for the hurt I caused them, and that I loved them.
Mom, I have learned how to do dishes since I left, and I have done dishes for a thousand people and for twenty people. I will do my own dishes when I come home. You and dad have provided me with so much, and I should appreciate that more and say “I love you” a little more often. I wasn’t the best daughter, I was pretty horrible at times, but I want that to change when I come home, and it’s already started.
Since then, it’s been this process of building a relationship with my parents on a different level. I’m now able to talk to them about changes I’m going through, things that hurt me, things that make me happy. I’m actually looking forward to calling them now. It took me being away for four months to realize it, and it took them letting their daughter go on a crazy adventure in order to come back home.
I haven’t had a lot of crazy, huge, dramatic changes or revelations during my DTS like some people do. I don’t feel “so undone” or “totally wrecked” from the experience of doing missions work, but I do feel changed, especially in my relationship with my parents, and I really do look forward to coming back to my family and my boyfriend. I can’t wait to see them in the airport when I land. This girl will be borderline running once I get off my flight!
Elizabeth, I am always amazed when I hear the stories of people who were "totally wrecked" or "undone" by their mission experience. Then, when I hear the back story, the story of where they were before their experience, it often makes sense. Your blog tells me two things. First, your mother and I must have done the right things to help prepare for some of the events you have experienced. Second, but even more important, God has you right where he wants you. There are people out there who believe there will be life changing events at every corner, but Gods timing is not always mans timing, and what seems like forever to us is but a moment for God. Your big ah-ha moment may take place after you return, or it may come months or even years after you return. Here is what I do know, when it does happen, it will be God who moves you and reveals this to you, not the prompting of someone’s vision of how you should be changed.
When your mother and I received the letters you wrote, we were both humbled and honored. Humbled because God had revealed these things to you and honored because your words told us you care deeply about our relationship. We realize how God has changed you through your letters, your blogs, your posts, and our conversations. We are looking forward to the new young lady who will return. And we will celebrate with a big BBQ, we will kill the fatted calf/pig (so to speak) not because you are a prodigal child who has returned, but because you are our child and in you we are well pleased.